Vent Sesh

Do you ever feel, like a plastic bag, drifting through—no I’m kidding, come on, this is for real guys.

Thank you to Alyson who let me be a part of this week’s Vent Sesh. I think it’s a really great and honest way for bloggers to tell readers more about themselves instead of ‘omg I love those shoes’, which, don’t get me wrong, I love to do, but this is a great opportunity.

Today’s sesh was open-ended which I found a little daunting. Just to pick something out of the blue that I was cranky about. Generally I’m a pretty happy person and thanks to loyal friends and loving family members, I’m able to keep that mood, but sometimes it’s exhausting and you just need a break.

I’m tired. I’m just worn out a little bit guys. Nothing specific has happened to make the sky fall but just the constant merry-go-round of days is a bit of a bummer recently. Right now I categorize my life into two categories, work and not work. I have found this to be an easy way to keep things organized but I’ve realized this system leaves no time for Kelsey. Let me break it down.

Work- I work 9-6 and I work hard. I do a good job and I aim to please. By 6:00pm I’m spent. It’s usually been a long day of multi-tasking, conference calls and creating things and even after that, sometimes I feel like I wasn’t good enough that day. I could have done something better.

Not Work- This is everything after 6:00pm. The two most important things are my friends and family and my dog. You all know a little bit about The BF-going strong after four years last week- and I have a handful of very close friends that I do my best to keep in touch with and make sure they’re happy. My family lives in Philadelphia so when they call, I answer, no matter what. Sometimes it’s hard to be away from them. I try my very best to talk to at least one of them everyday. Then there is Norman. My one year old joy. The BF and I got him in September and since then he has been a fluffy bundle of energy, love, half-eaten remote controls, vet bills, accidents and happiness. Having a puppy is no small task and while there is nothing in the world I’d rather do than come home to that little man wagging his tail, it makes it difficult to go to a happy hour with a friend or decide to be spontaneous with The BF.

I’m having a hard time expressing my frustration because it seems selfish. Who am I to bitch about not getting any me time? I have a great job, a loving boyfriend and family, a fabulous pup, a beautiful apartment and a great support network. Sometimes I just want to tell myself to man the eff up and deal with it, but putting on an act and what you’re really feeling are two different things.

I think I need to add a category. I’m not sure what I will call it yet but it will be the ‘Take Care of Kelsey’ category. It will be my space to break the cycle of work and not work. Doesn’t have to be big or expensive or time consuming but it needs to happen.  I know I'm not the only one who feels this way - we live in an incredibly busy and demanding world, and often times the last person that we take care of is ourselves. But it is so important. I'm going to make a better effort to make some 'me' time more often - I hope you do, too.